Zombies and the Twinkie Defense

Back when I was a useful member of society, I had a real job. I don't refer to my 34 years in the Foreign Service, but to the work that paid my way through school. I was reminded of this while reading about the closing of Hostess Brands, makers, of course, of Hostess Cupcakes--my food of choice while in elementary school and college--Twinkies, and a slew of other classics from the days when we knew that sugar was healthy.

I held two off-campus jobs while an undergrad at UCLA. The first with a small struggling pillow, cushion, and quilt manufacturer barely hanging on in the face, even then, of California's over regulated business environment, high costs, cheap imports, and a relentless unionization drive by the then International Lady Garments Workers Union (ILGWU). I got hired initially to work in the warehouse loading and unloading trucks, and then, when my boss discovered that I spoke fluent Spanish, to serve as a translator between management and the firm's mostly Mexican and Central American employees. The company faced constant efforts by ILGWU to unionize the workforce. The main ILGWU organizer was a self-confessed "former" member of the Communist Party of the USA, a charming, very smart, Spanish-speaking Jewish New Yorker who had worked for years in Chile prior to Allende's overthrow. He would hang around outside the parking lot, talking to the workers as they came and left. Two company guards made sure he did not enter company premises. The ILGWU eventually got a ruling from the courts or the Labor Department that allowed him access to the parking lot where he talked to the employees during lunch and other breaks. In my 18 or so months there, we saw some fist fights and shoving matches; lots of colorful descriptions of various mothers' moral character and employment; vandalizing of cars and trucks; pro- and anti-union threatening phone calls; and the regular presence of cops and immigration agents. The situation grew increasingly tense.

One day representatives from the Department of Labor showed up to supervise a vote on whether to unionize the plant. Management told us that because of the flood of cheap imports it could not pay the wages the union demanded; if the vote went union, the factory would go dark. The ILGWU man said management sought to scare us, and to pay no heed. The vote, as expected, went overwhelmingly pro-union; only two votes cast (one of them mine) against unionizing. Two or three months later, the plant closed, and moved to Mexico--probably employing relatives of the workers who had voted to go with the union. The day management announced to us that the plant would close, the union rep showed up, blamed management and said the ILGWU would fight for us. Never heard from the union again.

Out of work, I found another job with Disneyland working the night shift from 11 pm to 7:30 am. The work was on the grim side: lots of crawling around in the dark, cleaning and fixing things, dealing with a highly anti-semitic American Indian foreman (yes, indeed), and once falling into the water while trying to scrub some green crud off a mechanical elephant in the jungle ride. Disneyland, at least then, had the ultimate in corrupt arrangements with the Teamsters Union which represented the workforce at "The Happiest Place on Earth." Disney would hire a number of college students at sub-union wages, in exchange, we got no union benefits, but STILL HAD TO PAY union dues. Talk about adding insult to injury. With the union dues, and deductions for Social Security, and state and federal income taxes, my check could barely cover my rent and gasoline. I ate a lot of Hostess Cupcakes for lunch and dinner . . . do I know how to segue or what?

Hostess Brands announced on November 16 that because it could not reach a deal with one of its unions, the Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers International Union (BCTGM), the company will close,

“We deeply regret the necessity of today’s decision, but we do not have the financial resources to weather an extended nationwide strike,” said Gregory F. Rayburn, chief executive officer. “Hostess Brands will move promptly to lay off most of its 18,500-member workforce and focus on selling its assets to the highest bidders.” 

In addition to dozens of baking and distribution facilities around the country, Hostess Brands will sell its popular brands, including Hostess®, Drakes® and Dolly Madison®, which make iconic cake products such as Twinkies®, CupCakes, Ding Dongs®, Ho Ho’s®, Sno Balls® and Donettes®. Bread brands to be sold include Wonder®, Nature’s Pride ®, Merita®, Home Pride®, Butternut®, and Beefsteak®, among others. 

The wind down means the closure of 33 bakeries, 565 distribution centers, approximately 5,500 delivery routes and 570 bakery outlet stores throughout the United States.

This, of course, is a disaster for thousands of workers, executives, and investors, and for many communities. It goes back to a theme I have laid out before about the increasing economic illiteracy in the country, and the fact that so many prominent people are far removed from the real economy. To highlight that we only need to read the statement by AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka who blamed the closing on,

“What’s happening with Hostess Brands is a microcosm of what’s wrong with America, as Bain-style Wall Street vultures make themselves rich by making America poor . . . . Crony capitalism and consistently poor management drove Hostess into the ground, but its workers are paying the price.”

Trumka, in effect, blames Mitt Romney for Hostess closing down. He ignores, of course, that the company had been in trouble for a couple of years and that venture capitalists, similar to Bain, had taken a chance and invested in it, and kept it running for those two years. Trumka, of course, will continue to draw his roughly $280,000/year salary. 

The BCTGM also made a statement,

“Our members decided they were not going to take any more abuse from a company they have given so much to for so many years. They decided that they were not going to agree to another round of outrageous wage and benefit cuts and give up their pension only to see yet another management team fail and Wall Street vulture capitalists and 'restructuring specialists' walk away with untold millions of dollars. 

“Throughout this long and difficult process, BCTGM members showed tremendous courage, solidarity and devotion to principle. They were well aware of the potential consequences of their actions but stood strong for dignity, justice and respect.”

Trumka's rant and the BCTGM statement brought back memories of the words I heard years ago from the ILGWU man in that California parking lot. A lot of empty blather that won't pay the rent. I hope that the members enjoy their "dignity, justice, and respect" and, of course, the benefits that the taxpayers will now have to pay them.

We are seeing the consequences of the Obama war on "the rich" and the turning over of the economy to the zombies bound and determined to ruin it. We are hearing, in effect, the new Twinkies defense.

Zombies and Twinkies: the epitaph of America.